Find Someone (207/365)
#dylanthomas #staystrong #love #inspiration #innerstrength
In the middle of midterms I scrounged up this costume… I’m a doctor! Last Halloween and birthday on 6th Street as a UT student! #feelin22 (at 6th Street (Austin, TX))
Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from sixteen to here and all the same feel like sixteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breathe in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes.
I’m really feeling this song lately.
I want to disappear
Far from the folks I know
I want to get an answer
To why I was even born
No one here can tell me
What’s been haunting me all my life
Well this rat race has left me limping
Cause I balanced on the edge of the edge of the knife
Why am I here?
Oh what should I do?
Well is this the point I’m trying to prove?
If there’s a god in my head
Then there’s a devil too
How can I tell the difference
When they both claim to be true
Maybe God is God
Maybe the Devil is me
Well I just throw my chains on
And tell myself that I’m free
Chains - are they really there?
Is this just in my head?
Well I’ll just stay in bed
Life sure has its meaning
Over years I have postured the sun
Thieves and preachers robbed me
For many hat that I’ve hung
Now with my heart wide open
I listen to the wind just for a word
Sure, I know it’s futile
But that’s all I have in this world
To look down from the hill
And howl at the moon
All the tears I cried never salted any wounds
Well the earth is so tender and cruel
Well if you’re not there it’s still so beautiful